Learning to serve the Lord and my family one day at a time.

Learning to serve the Lord and my family one day at a time.

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Wednesday, August 6, 2014

The days are long

"The days are long but the years are short"
I seem to have prolific and poetic spurts of writing stored up in my head that only make their way forward as I'm attempting to doze off to sleep at night. David was out of town last week for a conference so I laid awake for much too long most night just thinking. I'm tempted to hop out of bed and furiously began hacking away at the keyboard but alas, babies don't sleep in and I would be paying tenfold for my sins come morning.
I snuggled my sweet boy in my bosom, nursing him long past he had fallen asleep. I could hear the muted roar of the freeway beyond his window and the rush of his sound machine. I gazed at this sweet face, cherishing our intimate time together. No one can explain motherhood or a mother's undying love until they experience it for themselves. So many days, I pray for the hours to pass quickly. I glance at the clock above our old piano. "10 am" it tells me, great only 8 more hours until I can speak to another adult again or use the bathroom without a partner.

Somedays I anxiously away for David to come through the front doors wearing his boots and ACUs and lovingly say "let me take the kids for you." Last week the days were insanely long with no one to come home and relieve my tired and weary self.
The days often seem like an endless cycles of work that is never truly finished. Of diaper changes with a wiggly little baby who I can barely get a diaper on before he is pulling the art off the walls or eating Destin. Laundry piles that final disappear only to make themselves mysteriously reborn in the morning. Meals that get eaten before I have a chance to sit down. Long. Long. Days.

I could wish it would fly by. Pray for the school days to come or butt wiping to be accomplished without a cry from the bathroom "MOM…" My prayer instead is to cherish these long, endless days. Days of dying to myself over and over again. Of discipline, fruit and forgiveness. Of joy and little sweet sticky faces.
I hold my sweet baby in my arm and kiss his little cherub face one last time. I pray the Lord will bless our home with more babies but I don't know the future. Nothing is for certain and all I know is right here and right now and I can love each day and pray that I use it to Glory His Name.

We have been working with Laura on scripture memory. It is so fun to see how quickly and enthusiastically she learns new verses of God's truth. I came across Psalm 118: 24 one day and thought what a relevant verse not only for my child but for this mother's heart-

 This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. 




3 comments:

  1. I remember those days well, and I miss them already. I sure didn't think I would, certainly not this soon. But there's a certain sweetness to babyhood and toddlerhood that is unique to that age and once it's gone, it's gone. I actually dreamed not too long ago that I saw Abby as a toddler, sort of a ghost-like figure going by, and I cried, reaching for her, longing to hold her at that sweet age again. So yes, you are right. Hold on and squeeze all the joy out of this stage that you can (true for all the stages, I suppose!). I can't lie though - I don't miss the nights of little sleep! I do enjoy that about the stage I'm currently in! :-) Your kids are beautiful. I enjoy reading your posts.

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    1. This post was such a slap in the face. As soon as I hit post Daniel woke up and spent the last two hours nursing and playing. I already can barely remember my kids' newborn days, they're already such a blur

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  2. Ah, Mary! What a sweet post! Indeed the days are long but the years short! The babies are in school before you know it, then they become teenagers and are gone! So little time to mold little lives. Indeed, you must die to self to be a good mommy, and you ARE! Thank you for sharing your heart!

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