Letting Go

Grabbing the hot muffin pan without a second thought, the scorching metal seared my fingers. I yelp (more like cuss) and the let pan drop to the oven door, spilling it's contents and bouncing onto the floor. I look at the orange goopy mess and am not sure whether to laugh or cry. 

It's just been one of those days where I've truly been on my knees asking for God's grace and a refreshed heart. I cannot changed my heart or my attitude through my own will power or hard work. God's grace is sufficient for me even when I cuss out the muffin batter spilled across my oven or cry over the fact that my husband isn't home the moment I want him home. 


A friend mentioned Ann Voskamp's book and blog to me yesterday and I've been captivated by her words of wisdom, full of Gospel truth, powerful writing style and pictures that make me long after better photography skills. 


I was browsing through her posts tagged with homemaking and point number six in this article struck a chord with me. " Homemaking is about making a home, not about making perfection. A perfect home is an authentic, creative, animated space where Peace and Christ and Beauty are embraced. Perfect does not equate to immaculate. "

I'm not going to lie. I'm not even sure I know what she means by "an animated space where Peace and Christ and Beauty are embraced." What does that mean for me in a practical sense? Spiritually? I pray the Lord will guide me to understand how to create a home where those virtues are embraced. 

I've been home a lot this week and I feel this pressure when I'm home to work as hard all day long as my husband works at school or as hard as I would on a job. Homemaking is my job and my calling and today I felt this suffocating, overwhelming guilt to stay busy all day long without ceasing for a moment or I would be eating the bread of idleness. Sometimes the Proverbs 31 woman stresses me into perfection.

What a mistake I've made. She is a picture of a woman in Christ who loves and serves the Lord and her family. She is what to strive towards, not what we must become. She is a fallen sinful woman just as I am. While she is a model for women and mothers I am nothing without Christ. Even with Christ, I will never reach perfection this side of heaven nor is it the Lord's will for me to keep a perfect house. 

I'm still not sure how to let go of my expectations for perfection but the Lord know. 

(Speaking of letting of perfection, I have no idea why the fonts are different sizes, it says they're the same when I was writing but it published in two sizes. Also does anybody know how to make the space between paragraphs smaller?) 

Menu Plan Monday

I seem to be on a streak of one week of menu planning and then one week off. We're eating lots of chicken since my freezer is full of it and I can't stand the texture of pork right now. Now that I'm in my second trimester most of my food aversions have disappeared but dislike of pork may be here to stay.

Monday
Crock pot red beans and rice with a side of vegetables. I will post the recipe if it comes out well.

Tuesday
Baked chicken and potatoes with vegetables.

Wednesday
Chicken Tortilla Soup

Thursday
Homemade Pizza

Friday
Tacos

Saturday
Tuna casserole

Sunday
Spanish Chicken

A New Addition

Psalm 127 

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,

   the fruit of the womb a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior

   are the children of one’s youth.

Blessed is the man

   who fills his quiver with them!

He shall not be put to shame

   when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

David and I are excited to announce that we are expecting a baby in mid November! The Lord is so good in answering our prayers to become parents. 


I told David way back on March 6. He had been gone for the weekend so I waited on pins and needles for him to get home. Ironically, I had ordered cheap pregnancy tests online several days earlier for use down the road but they hadn't yet arrived. I had one early pregnancy test left at home which tested positive. I didn't want to get too excited after just one test so I went to the dollar store to buy more. They came back negative. I later realized they weren't for early detection so my HCG levels where too low for the tests. I then went out again and bought some expensive early pregnancy tests from Rite Aid and took two more.  (I took several more later on in the week mostly out of excitement!)


By that point I was sure I was pregnant but wanted to tell David in person when he got home on Sunday. I went to Target and bought this adorable onesie, and placed it along with a pregnancy test in a gift box.

I told him I had a present for him when he got back the next day. He opened the box, glanced at the onesie and then opened the smaller box containing the pregnancy test. It took him a few seconds to realize what was going on. "You're pregnant? Really?" Were his first words. He wrapped me up in a big hug while I sobbed like a crazy pregnant lady all over his shirt.

 

We are humbled, excited and nervous about the blessing of a child and cannot to wait meet him or her in November. 

Tuna Casserole

I never know what to make for lunches on the weekend, I hate sandwiches and David's tired of eating them by Friday. I used to eat a can of tuna a day in high school until I read that you should limit your consumption because of the high mercury content. 


I normally don't like baked tuna because it tastes quite fishy but this recipe was delicious and after the two of us ate, there were enough leftovers for tomorrow's lunches. Because I try my best to use whole foods and cook from scratch, I don't use canned cream soups. Unfortunately, most casserole recipes call for cream of mushroom or cream of chicken. Instead of canned soup, this recipe makes a delicious and simple roux from scratch.  


Recipe courtesy of Diary of a Housewife
From-Scratch Tuna Casserole

3 tablespoons butter
4 tablespoons flour
3 cups milk 
2 heaping tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
2 cans tuna, drained
1 pound rotini pasta, cooked very al dente (very important, otherwise it will get mushy while baking!)
salt, pepper, onion powder, and garlic powder to taste 
1 heaping tablespoon shredded Parmesan cheese
2 heaping tablespoons panko bread crumbs (I used plain)

Melt the butter in a large saucepan, over medium heat.  Whisk in the flour all at once.  Add the milk a little at a time, whisking continuously until a thick sauce is formed (approximately ten minutes).  Remove from heat.

Stir in the grated Parmesan cheese and seasonings, whisking until well combined.  Add the pasta and tuna.  Mix well, and spread in an oiled 8x8  casserole dish. 

Top with Parmesan cheese, and panko bread crumbs.  Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes, then broil on low for 2-3 minutes, or until the topping is golden brown.

Frugal Fridays- Shower Curtain Liner

Once upon a time I didn't know you could wash a shower curtain liner so whenever ours got moldy and gross I would go to Target and buy a new one. Not very frugal! Then I read you can simply wash them in the washing machine. I prefer to use bleach because it gets rid of the mold and mildew. 1/2 cup of bleach and 1/4 cup of detergent with hot water does the trick. Air dry of course, plastic and heat don't go well together.

This is NOT my shower curtain!

Check out Frugal Friday's at Life as Mom

Menu Plan Monday

I know my husband was grateful I finally went to the grocery store yesterday. Even I was staring wide eyed into the fridge in hopes of something yummy to eat jumping out at me. I've probably bought too much chicken lately so we'll be eating our fair share of chicken over the coming few weeks.

Monday
Meatless Monday. Ok so I just made up meatless Monday but I've been wanting to institute a vegetarian night once a week and I like theme menu planning.

Here's my experimental recipe. Black beans and brown Mexican rice in tortillas baked with creamy tomatillo sauce and cheese. As long as it's spicy I think I will like it.

Tuesday
Dinner out at Wild Wings (BOGO on Tuesdays) to celebrate the end of David's junior year of Dental School (I can't believe he will be a senior next week!)

Wednesday - I'm considering making Wednesday soup and bread night since I usually get home late and need an easy Crock-pot meal that's ready when I get home.

Leftover frozen Vegetable and Lentil soup with garlic bread.

Thursday

Chicken and brown rice bake with fresh squash. 

Friday

Camping! Leftover frozen chili, fruit and s'mores for dessert. It's not camping unless you eat s'mores.

Saturday 
Camping! Lunch- sandwiches, fruit and crackers.
Home for dinner- chicken parmesan.

Sunday
Lunch - tuna casserole
Dinner - homemade chicken nuggets, mac 'n cheese (not homemade!) and veggies

Good Reads

photo source

I made a New Years Resolution to read one book a month (My real goal is two books but if I only get one read then I don't feel too badly). It's been going great so far and here's what I've been reading. I can't remember my second book for March and I'm pretty sure I read two.  I'm almost done with Pride and Prejudice so I'm counting it for April. Any suggestions for future reading?

I'm not a person who buys books and doesn't read them, but I do have books from college, books of David's and others on our bookshelf that I haven't read and I believe it's a crime to own a book and not read it. I'll get them all read eventually!

January
The Magicians Nephew - CS Lewis
Men in Black - Mark Levin

February
The Last Battle - CS Lewis
Ronald Reagan - Dinesh D'souza

March
The Core - Leigh Bortins
I forgot to write down the second book (maybe I really didn't read two!)

April
Republocrat - Carl Trueman
Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen

At the Seaside

This post is a bit belated, but I wanted to write it anyway. We had a wonderful short vacation over Spring Break last month, (how is it already May?!?) visiting the white sand beaches of Alabama, eating delicious seafood and spending time with David's sister, her husband and their adorable three children.

Gulf Shores, Alabama

Fort Morgan guarded the Bay of Mobile during the Civil War

USS Alabama

Sweet kids

Both of these outfits are handmade by my sister in law. Check out her shop